Vantage Media International has released a trailer for writer/director Rupert Bryan’s survival-frightener The Hike. Set in England’s countryside, the film follows Slovakian stunner Barbara Nedeljakova and her hot friends as they attempt to escape psycho-survivalists during what was to be a tranquil hiking expedition capped off with all-girl skinny dips.

Peep it:

The film’s official synopsis reads:

Kate (Zara Phythian) is back from a tour of duty in Afghanistan after seeing her soldier boyfriend die in combat. She has reunited with her best friends back home, who whisk her away on a ‘healing’ camping trip to a picturesque and remote area of the British countryside.

The girls make their way into the woods in search of the perfect place to camp, forget their sorrows, and enjoy their time together. On their hike they come across a mysterious group of Eastern Europeans who seem to be living off the land. They quickly move on to avoid an awkward confrontation and continue to their destination.

When they reach Sunset Point, they meet a group of rock climbers and form a quick and flirtatious friendship. But when darkness falls, and one of their friends goes missing, the girls will be forced to rely on each other and the rock climbers to find their friend and get out of the woods in one piece.

The Hike also stars Shauna MacDonald (The Descent), Jemma Bolt (How to Lose Friends and Alienate People), Lisa Marie Long (Black Tower Temptation), Stephanie Siadatan, Natalie Hughes, and Joanne Nutall. Vagina-less costars include Ben Loyd Holmes (”Torchwood”) and Tamer Hassan (Clash of the Titans).

The British Board of Film Classification has denied director Tom Six’s upcoming sequel The Human Centipede (Full Sequence) its 18 certificates (think of it as a rating). Without the BBFC’s approval, the film will not be allowed to play in the U.K.

Last year, Six told IFC:

When I was writing [First Sequence]. I had so many ideas that I couldn’t fit them all in the movie. And I wanted the audience to get used to this crazy centipede. Now, in ‘Part 2,’ I can use all my ideas. So everything is in it this time. I don’t hold back anything. It’s pretty nasty.

It appears the degenerate Dutchman wasn’t kidding. According to the BBFC, the principal focus of The Human Centipede (Full Sequence) is “the sexual arousal of the central character at both the idea and the spectacle of the total degradation, humiliation, mutilation, torture, and murder of his naked victims.”

The BBFC goes on to state (Spoiler Alert!):

Examples of this include a scene early in the film in which he masturbates whilst he watches a DVD of the original Human Centipede film, with sandpaper wrapped around his penis, and a sequence later in the film in which he becomes aroused at the sight of the members of the ‘centipede’ being forced to defecate into one another’s mouths, culminating in sight of the man wrapping barbed wire around his penis and raping the woman at the rear of the ‘centipede’.

There is little attempt to portray any of the victims in the film as anything other than objects to be brutalised, degraded and mutilated for the amusement and arousal of the central character, as well as for the pleasure of the audience. There is a strong focus throughout on the link between sexual arousal and sexual violence and a clear association between pain, perversity and sexual pleasure.

It is the Board’s conclusion that the explicit presentation of the central character’s obsessive sexually violent fantasies is in breach of its Classification Guidelines and poses a real, as opposed to a fanciful, risk that harm is likely to be caused to potential viewers.

Wow. They had me at “degradation” and “humiliation” of “naked victims.” But, barbed-wire rape? Looks like someone’s calling out A Serbian Film. I am really interested in finding out what newbie actresses Six managed to land this time.

The Human Centipede: First Sequence starred Ashlynn Yennie and Ashley C. Williams as American tourists abducted by an evil German scientist hell-bent on creating a human centipede by sewing them together mouth-to-anus.

IFC Films released the controversial film last April to critical acclaim from the horror community and surprisingly much of the mainstream media. Read my review here.

The movie-going experience has gone to shit. Along with outrageous prices and horrible service, theaters are plagued by those who would rather be tweeting and texting on their smartphones than watching the film that you have dropped $14 to see. It’s enough to make you want to hurl your $6 Icee at their heads … if it hadn’t cost you $6.

What’s worse is you can’t profile these douchebags. They’re old and young, male and female, and of all ethnicities. It happens at horror flicks, action movies, rom-coms, comedies, and even documentaries. Ask the theater managers to do something, and all you get is a return ticket so you can suffer through the same shit at a different date.

If only they could take a cue from the folks at the Alamo Drafthouse Cinema, which has a strict policy of kicking out texters without refund if they don’t comply to warnings. The following is a PSA the theater has created utilizing an angry call they received from a booted patron: