2013
07.06

The Top Ten Babes of Fourth of July Horror!

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Happy Fourth of July! Here’s hoping you guys didn’t blow your hands off while setting off fireworks this weekend, because you’re gonna need them. Listed below are Clatto’s Top Ten Babes of Fourth of July Horror. Not a lot of movies to pick from, but the chosen starlets are hot. Feel free to add your own names.

Enjoy:

10. SUSAN BACKLINIE (JAWS)

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Stunt woman and actress Susan Backlinie both terrified and titillated movie goers in 1975 as shark victim Chrissie Watkins in Steven Spielberg’s still frightening classic Jaws.

The film opens with Backlinie stripping off her clothes for a skinny dip in the ocean, where a great white lurks beneath the surface, ready to kill her and our boners.

Peep it:

9. KRISTEN CONNOLLY (THE BAY)

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Kristen Connolly plays cute MILF Stephenie in Academy Award-winning director Barry Levinson’s The Bay, a found-footage frightener about water-bred parasites that consume humans from the inside and out.The outbreak takes place in the seaside town of Chesapeake Bay during the Fourth of July.

Stephanie and her husband are taking their baby to visit with family. They’ve chosen to set sail into town and are videotaping their trip. Their holiday turns horrific when they arrive to find the residents of Chesapeake Bay playing hosts to scary and disgusting mutant isopods.

Peep it:

8. TORREY DEVITTO (I’LL ALWAYS KNOW WHAT YOU DID LAST SUMMER)

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“Pretty Little Liars” and “Vampire Diaries” star Torrey DeVitto (pictured on bottom) plays a hot rocker chick in Original Film’s I’ll Always Know What You Did Last Summer, a direct-to-video sequel in the I Know What You Did Last Summer franchise.

DeVitto plays one in a group of friends who stage a prank on the town of Southport, NC on July 4th to scare the townsfolk into believing that Fisherman Ben Willis is back to kill them all. The joke, however, is on the pranksters when the wrathful killer does return to slash, stab and impale their goofy asses.

Rock on:

7. BROOKE NEVIN (I’LL ALWAYS KNOW WHAT YOU DID LAST SUMMER)

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“Breakout Kings”and “Chicago Fire” star Brooke Nevin fares a little better than Torrey Devitto in I’ll Always Know What You Did Last Summer. As the film’s protagonist, her character is less douchey and rewarded with a longer life span.

Peep it:

6. SARAH MICHELLE GELLAR (I KNOW WHAT YOU DID LAST SUMMER)

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“Buffy the Vampire Slayer” star Sarah Michelle Gellar made her horror feature debut in the Kevin Williamson-penned 1997 teen-slasher I Know What You Did Last Summer. Gellar plays Helen Shivers, the Miss Croaker beauty pageant winner, who while on a drive with friends runs over Ben Willis, a fisherman with a homicidal past.

Gellar plays second banana to Jennifer Love Hewitt, but brings her A-game B-game to the role in a variety of tight tank tops and clingy dresses. She also speaks the sexiest lines of her career during the opening scene: “Come ride in the back with me. I’ll let you do things to me.”

I know you want to watch this:


5. MARY ELISABETH WINSTEAD (FINAL DESTINATION 3)

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Not certain if Final Destination 3 takes place during the Fourth of July, but a chunk of the film takes place during a fireworks display at a fairgrounds. Mary Elisabeth Winstead plays sexy high school senior Wendy Christensen, who… what’s that… we had you at high school senior? You guys are sick!

Sadly, Winstead’s wardrobe doesn’t include plaid minis and knee-high socks. In fact, she sticks to plain-Jane outfits that are meant to remind us that she is a good student and capable of figuring death’s game plan out. But, despite the nerdy dress code, Winstead still conjures up those old school girl fantasies.

4. OLIVIA D’ABO (THE SPIRIT OF 76)

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Olivia D’Abo, best known as Kevin Arnold’s hippie sister Karen Arnold on ABC’s “The Wonder Years,” plays a time traveler named Chanel-6 in the Lucas Reiner (son to Carl, brother to Rob) 1990 sci-fi comedy The Spirit of ’76.

Set in the year 2176, Chanel-6 is one of three time travelers sent back in time to July 4, 1776 to recover the U.S. Constitution and the Declaration of Independence after all recorded U.S. history is lost in a magnetic storm. Things go wrong and the group ends up in 1976 at the height of disco and hippie culture.

Hilarity and D’Abo in skintight bell-bottoms ensue:

3. VIVICA A. FOX (INDEPENDENCE DAY)

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She plays a stripper! A stripper who must work an empty house while hostile alien invaders hover over the earth in giant space crafts, prepping to blow the shit out of the earth and its inhabitants. She plays a stripper that rescues the First Lady and keeps hero Will Smith motivated enough to kick the tires and light the fires.

German director and co-writer Roland Emmerich could have made Vivica A. Fox’s character a doctor or nurse, an educator or cop, even been a doting housewife. The fact that she’s a stripper shows us that sometimes it takes a foreigner to remind us of what makes America great.

This is not a clip from ID4, but you won’t care:

2. JENNIFER LOVE HEWITT (I KNOW WHAT YOU DID LAST SUMMER)

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After stealing Neve Campbell’s thunder on “Party of Five” with her abundant and natural talents, Jennifer Love Hewitt trumped the Scream star once again by toplining the 1997 teen-slasher I Know What You Did Last Summer and its 1998 sequel I Still Know What You Did Last Summer.

Both films take place over the Fourth of July holiday and find Hewitt playing Julie James, one of four friends who accidentally kill a fisherman and keep the crime a secret. Unfortunately for Julie—and all those who befriend her—the fisherman is a homicidal maniac not easily deterred by boob-revealing tank tops.

1. MELISSA MOLINARO (JERSEY SHORE SHARK ATTACK)

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Stunner Melissa Molinaro made her horror movie debut last year in Syfy’s Jersey Shore Shark Attack, a campy creature-feature that spoofs MTV’s “Jersey Shore.” Molinaro plays Nookie, one in a group of guidos desperately trying to convince officials to shut down the beach after a man is killed by a shark.

Molinaro is best known in the States for her appearances on the reality competition shows “Making the Band 3″ and “Pussycat Dolls Present: The Search for the Next Doll.”Jersey Shore Shark Attack probably won’t change that, but Molinaro is one to keep an eye on (like you wouldn’t).