Director Robert Rodriguez has unleashed a “gut-ripping” red-band trailer for his grindhouse-y revenge-thriller Machete. The gleefully violent clip provides a glimpse of the film’s all-star cast including Jessica Alba, Michelle Rodriguez, Robert De Niro, Steven Seagal, Cheech Marin, Jeff Fahey, and the hardest working Mexi-can in all of Hollywood Danny Trejo.

The trailer also features some boner-inducing nudity from someone who looks a lot like Elise or Electra Avellan. Despite jerking off to watching the damn thing over 50 times , I can’t quite tell if its one of the sisters, a body double (though face & boobs are in same shot), or a different actress all together.

What do you vatos think:

Looks like its game over for the world’s most successful and best horror movie franchise.

Saw producers Oren Koules and Mark Burg are expected to announce today at Comic-Con that Saw 3-D, the seventh chapter in the Jigsaw saga, will be the last film in the innovative horror series.

Peep the first teaser trailer (courtesy of IGN):

But, it’s not all sad news.

Guinness World Records editor-in-chief Craig Glenday will be on hand tonight to officially name Saw as the Most Successful Horror Movie Series. To date, the Saw films have earned $732 million in global box office sales.

Come Halloween, you can add my $15 to that total. Saw remains one of the very few horror series that delivers on both story and brutality. I can’t wait for the reboot!

Saw 3-D is directed by Kevin Greutert (Saw 6) and was shot in authentic 3-D. The film stars the great Tobin Bell (John Kramer/Jigsaw), Costas Mandylor (Det. Hoffman), Betsy Russell (Jill Tuck), genre babe Gina Holden (Final Destination 3) and original Saw player Cary Elwes, reprising his role as Dr. Lawrence Gordon.

Costarring are Sean Patrick Flanery (Mongolian Death Worm), Chad Donella (Final Destination), Laurence Anthony, Dean Armstrong (Repo! The Genetic Opera), Naomi Sniekus, and which ever aspiring actress won VH1’s “Scream Queens 2” reality competition.

Saw 3-D arrives in theaters on Oct. 29.

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Pictured here is the first glimpse of actress Natalie Portman dressed as ballet dancer Nina in acclaimed director Darren Aronofsky’s new supernatural thriller Black Swan. While the costume lacks the je ne sais quoi (that’s French for sluttiness) of her stripper outfit in Closer, it does make me want to bang the hell out of a bird.

Black Swan stars Portman, Mila Kunis, Winona Ryder, and Kristina Anapau as dancers competing to land a role in their company’s production of “Swan Lake.” The film has generated a lot of buzz thanks in part to a reportedly graphic sex scene between Portman and Kunis.

The film also stars Barbara Hershey (Riding the Bullet) as Nina’s mother, Sebastian Stan, and Vincent Cassel (The Cross) as the ballet’s director Yevna.

Black Swan will open the Venice International Film Festival on Sept 1.

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Spanish director Rodrigo Cortes’ new Hitchcockian thriller Buried stars Ryan Reynolds as an abducted American citizen in Iraq who is buried alive in a coffin with nothing more than a lighter, a knife, and a mobile phone. The film was shot in Barcelona for $3 million and features Reynolds as the only actor onscreen.

Peep the new trailer:

Is it me or does the woman who answers Reynold’s call sound exactly like the type of unhelpful asshat hired by AOL? Well, at least it wasn’t outsourced to India.

Cortes, a self-described Hitchcock fanatic, has garnered international acclaim for his stylish and outside-the-box filmmaking, winning awards for his 2001 short 15 Dias—which starred 100 actors in 200 locations—and 2007’s Concursante. Cortes’ next project is the paranormal thriller Red Lights.

Lionsgate picked up the North American distribution rights to Buried at this year’s Sundance Film Festival for $4 million.

Just in time for Comic-Con, the House of Mouse has released a bitchin’ new trailer for its upcoming sci-fi actioner Tron: Legacy. A sequel to Disney’s 1982 classic Tron, the film centers on Sam Flynn’s (Garrett Hedlund) search for his father Kevin (Jeff Bridges) inside the Tron mainframe.

Trailer highlights include seeing 60-year-old Bridges on screen as a young man once again and Olivia Wilde in latex doing what hot chicks in latex do best: move and stuff. The money-shot, however, comes at the ass-end of the trailer when we see Kevin Flynn jump into his a new ride (goodbye light-cycle).

Take a look (courtesy of Yahoo):

Summit Entertainment has rolled out the first official images for its Nicholas Cage road-rage supernatural-actioner Drive Angry 3-D. Directed by Patrick Lussier, the film costarsthe very hot Amber Heard (pictured above), milfy Charlotte Ross, Playboy model Christa Campbell, and some other fine vagina-less actors.

Drive Angry follows a man (Cage) on a quest to run down the pricks that murdered his daughter and abducted his grandchild. Producer Mike De Luca (Priest, GhostRider) promises the film will be rated a hard R and include plenty of “car parts and body parts flying at you in 3-D.”

The film’s official synopsis reads:

In the newest 3D action-adventure from the director of MY BLOODY VALENTINE, DRIVE ANGRY stars Nicolas Cage as Milton, a hardened felon who has broken out of hell for one last chance at redemption. Intent on stopping a vicious cult who murdered his daughter, he has three days to stop them before they sacrifice her baby beneath a full moon.

He’s joined by Piper (Amber Heard) – a young, sexy waitress who liberates her ex-boyfriend’s cherry-red muscle car in order to help Milton.  Now, the two of them are hot on the trail of the deadly leader of the cult, Jonah King (Billy Burke), who believes it is his destiny to use the baby to unleash hell on earth.

But the bloodthirsty cult is the least of Milton’s problems.  The police are after him too. And worse, an enigmatic killer known only as “The Accountant” – who has been sent by the Devil to retrieve Milton and deliver him back to hell. With wicked cunning and hypnotic savagery, the Accountant will relentlessly pursue Milton at high speed across the country until his mission is accomplished.

Fueled by high octane and pure rage, Milton must use his anger to go beyond all human limits to avenge his daughter’s murder, before his last chance at redemption is revoked.

Like I said … he’s out to run over some pricks.

Drive Angry 3-D arrives in theaters on Feb. 11, 2011. It’s vagina-less costars include Billy Burke, William Fichtner, David Morse, Bryan Massey, and Pruitt Taylor Vince.

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Looks like director Zack Snyder (Legend of the Guardians: Owls of Ga’Hoole) is ready to dine in hell with graphic novelist Frank Miller (The Spirit) once more. The minds behind 300 have sealed a deal to adapt the story of Xerxes for the big screen.

Snyder tells 24 Frames:

We closed the writing deal on Xerxes.  We started writing about a week ago.  So we’re doing it.  It’s happening.

This movie follows Themistocles and the Battle of Artemisium, which coincidentally happens on the exact same three days as the Battle of Thermopylae [which was the basis of 300].

This one starts off with a quick retelling of the why of the Persian wars.  It starts off at the Battle of Marathon and then it goes back to Themistocles finding out that Persians are invading again, and off we go over to learn a little bit about why Xerxes is the way he is.

Xerxes succeeded his father Darius the Great as ruler of the Persian Empire in 486 BC, four years after the defeat at Marathon. He was portrayed by Rodrigo Santoro (“Lost”) in the film 300.

Snyder wouldn’t confirm if he would direct the project, but appears ready to take the reigns (most likely as soon as Warner Bros. backs up a truckload of cash at his door).

Says Snyder:

It’s really going to depend on what the studio wants to do and what we do when we finish; I don’t have a directing deal in place but we are writing it, so call it intent.  If there was a crime they could probably convict me.

Released in 2007, 300 has grossed over $450 million worldwide and given Scottish actor Gerard Butler a huge career to squander away with lame rom-coms and an all-burrito diet (dude is getting plump).

(UPDATE: XERXES GETS NEW TITLE & DIRECTOR)

Scream 4 starlet Hayden Panettiere is dispelling rumors that she is not happy with the changes made to her character during recent rewrites of franchise creator Kevin Williamson’s script by Scream 3 scribe Ehren Kruger.

She tells Access Hollywood:

I don’t know whether it’s somebody projecting or, who knows where it came from, but ultimately it was very untrue and I love my character…I’m having a really good time doing it…it’s a really great cast.

All the original cast is back. We’ve got Neve Campbell and David Arquette and Courteney Cox…We’ve got a brand new cast – myself and Emma Roberts…[Director] Wes Craven is an amazing human being and such a nice guy.

It is such a pleasure to work with him…you can feel the crews at ease. They’re able to have fun — it’s not like twisting their arm to come to work. They actually really, really enjoy it, so it’s been a blast thus far.

I know. Reading about how much an actress loves her new role, director, and costars is about as exciting as looking at pictures of someone drinking water.

Oh, that reminds me, here you have some on-the-set photos of returning Scream player Courteney Cox as she goes to …

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British actress Jaime Murray has joined the cast of Starz’s “Spartacus: Gods of the Arena,” a new six-part prequel series to the network’s runaway hit “Spartacus: Blood and Sand.” Murray will play Capua socialite Gaia, a friend to Lucretia, wife of scheming ludus owner Batiatus.

Murray is best known for her turn as psychotic arsonist Lila Tournay in season two of the Showtime serial-killer drama “Dexter.” The 32-year-old actress currently plays “the real” H.G. Wells on the Syfy network’s quirky “X-Files” meets Raiders of the Lost Ark series “Warehouse 13.”

“Gods of the Arena” follows the House of Batiatus as it struggles to make a name for itself pre-Spartacus. Australian actor Dustin Clare headlines the series as gladiator champion Gannicus. John Hannah and Lucy Lawless reprise their “Spartacus: Blood and Sand” roles as sinister spouses Batiatus and Lucretia.

Also returning are Peter Mensah and Manu Bennett as gladiators Doctore and Crixus, respectively. Andy Whitfield, who plays Spartacus on the original series, will also make an appearance on the new show.

“Spartacus: Gods of the Arena” will begin shooting next month in New Zealand and premiere on Starz in January. The second season of “Spartacus: Blood and Sand” goes into production later this year.

Those attending Comic-Con this week can see Lawless, Whitfield, Hannah, and Viva Bianca at the “Spartacus: Blood and Sand” panel on July 23.

Victoria Secret model Rosie Huntington-Whiteley is currently hard at work on her feature film debut Transformers 3. The 23-year-old acting novice replaces Megan Fox as Shia LaBeouf’s love interest.

As a die-hard Megan Fox stalker fan, I have been skeptical about Whiteley taking Fox’s place in the Michael Bay film. However, after watching this video taken from her topless pictorial in Spanish magazine DT, I’m starting to warm up to the idea (Thanks K-Y Warming Jelly!).

Check it out: