09.06
Our penis weeps for all the hot horror babes we’ve lost in the past few years. Sure, ranking them in hotness may appear distasteful, but we all grieve in our own way.
Feel free to leave your condolences, comments, complaints, and contributions.
10. Ellen Page (1987 – 2020)
Ellen Page made her horror film debut at 18 in the brutal psychological thriller Hard Candy, playing a seductive 14-year-old who lures and tortures a child molester (Patrick Wilson) she believes is responsible for the disappearance of a local teenage girl.
Later, she played pretty mutant Kitty Pride in director Brett Ratner’s X-Men: The Last Stand and Bryan Singer’s X-Men: Days of Future Past. She also shined as a hot architecture grad in Christopher Nolan’s dreamscape mind-fuck Inception. Her last two films were the zombie apocalypse thriller The Cured and the 2017 remake of Joel Schumacher’s classic ’90s hit Flatliners.
In 2008, Page was ranked #61 in FHM’s list of the 100 Sexiest Women in the World. Inexplicably, she fell off the face of the earth in 2020. Even sites like IMDB and Wikipedia have no record of her existence.
09. KAYLEE HOTTLE (2008 – 2026)
Deaf actress Kaylee Hottle made her feature film debut in 2021’s Godzilla vs. Kong as Jia, the last Iwi native and adopted daughter of hot anthropological linguist Dr. Ilene Andrews (Rebecca Hall). She reprised the role in 2024’s Godzilla x Kong: The New Empire.
Hottle died at 18 after her most-likely drunk friend crashed their car in the small hours of the night. Her father, reportedly, forgives the driver, but our balls are sad and angry.
08. M3GAN (2022 – 2025)
Atomic Monster and Blumhouse continued to put the AI in j-AI-l bait with the release of M3GAN 2.0, an ambitious but failed sequel to its blockbuster thriller about a murderous, AI-powered companion doll for misfit kids.
Taking a page from Terminator 2: Judgement Day, the sequel pits a reprogrammed M3GAN against a more advanced, military-grade AI robot, played by “Ahsoka” babe Ivanna Sakhno (AI cat-fight… meow!).
Unfortunately, audiences hated M3GAN’s makeover and tanked the movie at the box office so hard it destroyed the proposed M3GAN cinematic universe, casting standalone Soulm8te to VOD and possibly killing any hopes for another sequel.
07. ANNE HECHE (1969 – 2022)
Anne Heche’s death was straight out of a horror movie. While driving her Mini Cooper on Aug. 5, 2022, she crashed into someone’s garage before driving off to collide into another person’s car, only to flee the scene and crash into a house, where her vehicle exploded, charring the actress alive.
What she was trying to escape was never explained, and disturbing live video of Heche sitting up while on an ambulance gurney had people speculating that she had survived the accident and something sinister was afoot.
Heche starred in such notable films as Volcano, I Know What You Did Last Summer, Slasher Films’ debut Nothing to Fear, kinky psych-thriller Birth, and Gus Van Sant’s 1998 Psycho remake.
06. AALIYAH (1979 – 2001)
Like so many superstars before her, R&B pop star Aaliyah died after her cocaine-riddled pilot crashed her airplane.
The 22-year-old star made her horror debut in the cult classic Queen of the Damned, based on Anne Rice’s 1988 novel of the same name, and the third book in her “Vampire Chronicles” series. She played Akasha, the very first vampire, seeking help from the Vampire Lestat to rule mankind.
Aaliyah died before getting to see the finished movie. Unfortunately, we didn’t.
05. BRITTANY MURPHY (1977 – 2009)
Brittany Murphy was pronounced dead in December of 2009. Most assumed mountains of drugs were to blame, but an autopsy report showed she passed from pneumonia and severe iron deficiency anemia. When her husband died of the same a few months later, people figured the docs were on dope… and that Murphy and her husband died of HIV complications.
Known for her performances in 8 Mile and Clueless, Murphy’s horror creds include Sin City, Don’t Say a Word, Deadline, The Prophecy 2, Freeway, Abandoned, and her last movie Something Wicked. She also voiced Luanne on Fox TV’s “King of the Hill.”
04. SHANNEN DOHERTY (1971 – 2024)
Shannen Doherty played hot Minnesota transplant Brenda Walsh on the hit teen soap “Beverly Hills 90210,” hot witch Prue Halliwell on the supernatural drama “Charmed,” and Heather Duke, the hottest “Heather” at Westerburg High School, in Michael Lehmann’s dark comedy masterpiece Heathers.
Doherty, known for her “bad girl” rep at the height of her fame, also posed for Playboy twice: first, at 22, on the cover of the March 1994 issue as part of a celebrity spread; and nearly 10 years later, on the cover of the December 2003 issue, which also featured a 10-page nude pictorial.
Jesus, God in Heaven, why’d you have to kill such hot snatch?
03. MICHELLE TRACHTENBERG (1985 – 2025)
Michelle Trachtenberg played Buffy Summer’s hot younger sister on Joss Whedon’s beloved high school horror series “Buffy the Vampire Slayer.” On the big screen, she thrilled as a hot sorority girl in the 2006 remake of Black Christmas and as Jenny in the hilarious teen sex comedy Euro Trip.
Trachtenberg also appeared on the cover of Maxim magazine’s March 2011 issue and was featured in a lingerie-based pictorial at 25. Her last two films were the horror comedy Evil Genius and the sci-fi thriller The Scribbler.
Rumored to be a hardcore drinker, she passed last year from liver transplant complications.
02. DAVEIGH CHASE (1990 – 2026)
Daveigh Chase is like meeting someone as a kid and then meeting them again as an adult… you want to bang. It’s mind-blowing. One minute she’s playing a creepy kid on your VCR and the next thing you know, she makes the cut on Maxim’s Hot 100 in 2009.
Chase made her movie debut in the 2001 cult favorite Donnie Darko and followed it up a year later as vengeful ghost Samara Morgan in Gore Verbinski’s The Ring. She reprised her role as Donnie Darko’s young sister, Samantha, in the 2009 sequel S. Darko. Her last horror film was 2016’s Jack Goes Home.
Chase, who also starred on HBO’s “Big Love” and voiced Lilo Pelekai in the Lilo & Stitch franchise, died seven days after receiving a mysterious call. No, no, sadly she passed in June from AIDS after living on the streets with her junkie boyfriend.
01. HAYDEN PANETTIERE (1989 – 2026)
Hayden Panettiere got her big Hollywood break at 16 playing Claire Bennet, a hot cheerleader with regenerative powers, on NBC’s “Heroes.” She won horror fans over with her portrayal of fright-freak-turned-FBI-agent Kirby Reed in Scream IV and Scream VI. We’ll catch her one last time in Sleepwalker from Leonardo DiCaprio’s Appian Way.
In 2008, she was ranked #5 on FHM’s list of the 100 Sexiest Women in the World and #13 in Maxim’s Hot 100.
Panettiere died on August 16 from cardiac arrest, months after the release of her tell-all memoir, where she discussed being laid down next to an old, famous nude British singer (rumored to be James “You’re Beautiful” Blunt) by a trusted friend.
What caused the cardiac arrest is still not known. Many speculate a drug overdose, citing the starlet’s mental health and substance abuse issues—but isn’t that what they’d want people to think if they had to kill her for knowing too much about Hollywood and its satanic, perverted ways?
