The premise behind director Tom Six’s mad-scientist thriller The Human Centipede (First Sequence) is sure to make most people’s skin crawl. But, if you’re not like most people and have grown elephant balls watching films that depict torture and eye-socket rape, the idea of a surgeon sewing people together mouth-to-anus to form a human centipede may seem too outrageous to be frightening.

Relax. You’re in good hands.

Six does an impressive job of avoiding cheap torture-porn thrills and direct-to-DVD cheese. Once past the film’s sensational hook, the horror of being abducted—for whatever reasons—begins to set in. Humor is peppered throughout the story, but it is dark and organic, birthed from the insanity of the ordeal at hand. Before you know it, you too are being held captive for 90 minutes of white-knuckle anguish.

Lindsay and Jenny, played by Ashley C. Williams (a true find) and Ashlynn Yennie respectively, are American tourists in Germany. On their way to a party, their car gets a flat and strands them on a desolate backwoods road. Neither of the girls knows how to change a tire so they decide to walk through the woods in search of help.

While some may roll their eyes at the set-up, I think it’s effective in establishing the characters’ lack of resourcefulness—something that will cost them dearly when faced with a life-or-death situation. Besides, not everyone knows how to change a tire (don’t judge me).

The girls eventually stumble upon a secluded villa owned by Dr. Heiter, a retired surgeon specializing in the separation of conjoined twins. Dr. Heiter is played by German actor Dieter Laser (think Christopher Walken meets Anthony Perkins), who turns in what is sure to be one of horror’s most memorable villains.

The good doc looks the ladies over and invites them in, but only after making sure they’re alone. He offers them a roofie-laced beverage and can barely contain his eagerness to harm while attempting small talk.

When the girls awake, Dr. Heiter reveals his plan to join them, and a Japanese abductee named Katsuro, ass-to-mouth to form a human centipede. The doctor explains that this will only be possible through a surgical procedure that will fuse their gastric systems.

Once stripped and sewn together (boy-girl-girl), it’s only a matter of time before Katsuro has to take a shit … into Lindsay’s mouth. It’s the moment Dr. Heiter (and—just admit it—you) has been waiting for.  “Feed her! Feed her,” he commands, pleased and titillated.

Lindsay, however, refuses to eat shit and die. Though stuck in the middle of Dr. Heiter’s human centipede, she orchestrates her final daring escape.

The Human Centipede took Best Picture honors at the 2009 Scream Fest LA Film Festival. The film also won awards for Best Horror Film and Best Horror Actor (Laser) at the 2009 Fantastic Fest.

The Human Centipede is available today on VOD (check your cable listings) and expands nationally for limited theatrical midnight showings on May 7.

Looks like “Glee’s” Dianna Agron has got something to cheer about. The actress, who turns 24 today, has been cast as the female romantic lead in DreamWorks’ sci-fi actioner I Am Number Four. The film marks Agron’s major studio debut.

Four is an adaptation of the upcoming HarperCollins young-adult novel of the same name written by James Frey (”A Million Little Pieces”) and Jobie Hughes. It’s plot centers on nine aliens living incognito as high school students in Paradise, Ohio after their home planet is destroyed by evil extraterrestrials.

Agron will play a high schooler who falls for alien Number Four, played by Alex Pettyfer (Beastly). The film also stars Sharlto Copley (District 9) and blonde stunner Teresa Palmer (The Sorcerer’s Apprentice).

Count on I Am Number Four to be in theaters on Feb. 18, 2011.

Warner Bros. has released the first official trailer for its upcoming supernatural western Jonah Hex. Josh Brolin (Planet Terror) stars as the film’s titular hero, John Malkovich (Transformers 3) plays the heavy, and Megan Fox (Jennifer’s Body) makes it all watchable as feisty bordello babe Leila.

Take a look:

Originally introduced in 1977 by DC Comics, Jonah Hex is a former Confederacy-officer-turned-outlaw-bounty-hunter hired by the U.S. military to stop a diabolical madman and his army of evil in exchange for his freedom.

Jonah Hex is directed by Jimmy Hayward (Horton Hears a Who) with an assist from I Am Legend director Francis Lawrence. Costars include Will Arnett (Monsters Vs. Aliens), Michael Shannon (Bug), David Jensen (The Mist), Natacha Itzel (The Dunwich Horror), Brandi Coleman (Battle: Los Angeles), Michael Fassbender (Eden Lake), and Aidan Quinn (The Eclipse).

Jonah Hex rides into theaters on June 18.

If you’re one of the few who still peruses video store aisles in search of masturbation fodder hidden cinematic gems, chances are you’ve found Swedish-born actress Helena Mattsson on the box of the 2007 direct-to-DVD erotic sci-fi thriller Species IV: The Awakening.

Despite appearances on various TV shows (“Legend of the Seeker”) and a bit part in last year’s Bruce Willis sci-fi actioner Surrogates, Mattsson’s portrayal of Species’ nude and horny half-alien/half-human hybrid remains her most standout role to date. This, however, can soon change as the stunning 26-year-old makes an appearance in Marvel Pictures’ Iron Man 2 as a character named Rebecca.

OK, odds are we’ll still see her in Species V: Naked Again to Pay My Rent. But, for the time being, Mattsson is enjoying the A-list treatment. This includes attending Iron Man 2 red carpet premieres in sexy dresses that are so tight her nipples pop out (pictured above).

Enjoy!

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Horror icon Wes Craven is finally talking about his upcoming reboot of the Scream franchise. The 70-year-old director/producer confirms what writer Kevin Williamson first announced at last year’s American Film Market: There will be a new Scream trilogy and original players Neve Campbell, Courtney Cox, and David Araquette will return for Scream 4.

He tells EW:

I’m fascinated by what this movie is. I can’t think of another film that has not only a true trilogy, where you’re following a single central character over three pictures, but has the complexity to the story and other characters that also have continued along. And then 10 years later, to come back to those same characters and same actors, and continue that story in a way that’s totally organic. It’s kind of unprecedented.

It’s very much about the last 10 years, and where we are right now. “New decade, new rules” is very much the keynote of the film, that is, trying to figure out what sort of rules (the new Ghostface) is following. How do we fight this killer without a road map? We have to figure out where we are.

There have been 10 years of no Ghostface, but there has been the movie-within-a-movie Stab. We have fun with the idea of endless sequels, or “sequelitis” as Kevin calls it in the script. Sid goes through these three horrendous things, and Stab was based on those horrible things. And then they’ve been taken by a studio and run into the ground in a series of sequels.

She has been off by herself and living her own life, and she’s even written a book that has gotten a lot of critical acclaim. She’s kind of put her life back together in the course of these 10 years. But, certainly, there would be no Scream without Ghostface, so she has to confront him again, but now as a woman who has really come out the darkness of her past.

Scream 4 kicks off the trilogy on April 15, 2011.

The premiere for Platinum Dunes’ A Nightmare on Elm Street was held last night at the Grauman’s Chinese Theater in Hollywood, CA.  I would have attended, but I fell asleep (ba-rump-pum!). I am, however, catching a screening of the flick tonight and should have a review ready for my new upcoming Muertos at the Movies segment.

Attending the event were stars Jackie Earle Haley, Rooney Mara, Thomas Dekker, Kyle Gallner, Clancy Brown, Connie Britton, and Platinum Dunes co-founder Michael Bay. Sadly, it appears Katie Cassidy was absent during the shindig.

Among the celebrities spotted were “Spartacus” babe Erin Cummings, Shannon Elizabeth (Night of the Demons), Playboy’s Kendra Wilkinson, McLovin’ himself Christopher Mintz-Plasse (Kick-Ass), Efren “Vote Pedro” Ramirez (Napoleon Dynamite), Nicky Whelan (Halloween 2), Jordana Brewster (The Texas Chainsaw Massacre: The Beginning), Lisa Wilcox (Nightmare on Elm Street 5), Kali Hawk (Couple’s Retreat), Bridget Marquardt (Scary Movie 4), and Freddy rival Jason, aka Derek Mears (Friday the 13th).

A Nightmare on Elm Street opens April 30.

Photos courtesy of Zimbio.

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Despite their roles as tramps-turned-human-punching-bags in director Michael Winterbottom’s controversial adaptation of the Jim Thompson’s 1952 novel The Killer Inside Me, Kate Hudson and Jessica Alba appeared to be in a playful mood during the film’s premiere at the 9th annual Tribeca Film Festival in New York.

The sexy duo held hands and posed for photographers during the red carpet event. Alba even appear to cop a feel on Hudson’s cooter. After the premiere, Alba and Hudson partied with Winterbottom and costar Casey Affleck at the film’s after-party.

The Killer Inside Me follows sadistic sociopath Lou Ford (Affleck), a 29-year-old Texas lawman engaged in a beat, fuck, and kill spree.

The film’s extreme use of misogynistic sex and violence caused a shit-storm of criticism at this year’s Sundance Film Festival, inciting vocal protest and walkouts (click here to see the good stuff offending scenes). Regardless, IFC picked up the North American rights to the film for $1.5 million.

The Killer Inside Me will be released in summer.

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Sara Paxton has signed on to headline director Ti West’s haunted-hotel thriller The Innkeepers. The film is being shot in Connecticut at the Yankee Pedlar Inn, a hotel long believed to be truly haunted.

Paxton and costar Pat Healy will play the last remaining hotel clerks working during the haunted Yankee Pedlar’s final days. Top Gun’s Kelly McGillis also stars as one of the hotel’s creepy guests.

The film’s synopsis reads:

THE INNKEEPERS is centered around the final two employees working in a haunted hotel before it goes out of business.  After over one hundred years in business, The Yankee Pedlar Hotel is about to close its doors for good. The last remaining clerks, Claire (Paxton), a twenty something that has come to terms with her lot in life, and Luke (Healy), a computer-smart loner, are convinced that the hotel is haunted and are determined to prove it.

As time ticks down to the final days of operation, mysterious guests check in including Leanne Rease-Jones (Kelly McGillis), a former TV actress turned psychic, and an old man insistent on staying in room 353. As several strange occurrences begin to add up, both Claire and Luke must make the crucial decision on what to believe and what not to believe…

Paxton, who has a string of family-friendly features, broke out of her good girl image with her starring role in 2009’s brutally violent—and so-much-better-than-the-original—remake of Wes Craven’s The Last House on the Left.

The Innkeepers is West’s followup to his mind-numbingly dull and highly overrated The House of the Devil.

For those of you keeping track, Danny Trejo has starred for Robert Rodriguez as Razor Charlie in From Dusk Till Dawn, Navaja (Spanish for blade) in Desperado, and Machete (Spanish for machete) in the upcoming revenge-thriller of the same name.

Now, he is set to play Chuchillo (Spanish for knife) in the Rodriguez-produced reboot of 1987’s Predator.

Check it out:

If Chuchillo isn’t the last man standing, I will have lost all faith in Robert Rodriguez. I mean what’s Adrien Brody gonna do? Sneeze on the Predators with that big schnoz? C’mon.

Predators is directed by nimrod Antal and stars Danny Trejo, Adrien Brody, Laurence Fishburne, Walton Goggins, Topher Grace, and Alice Braga. The film opens on July 9.

New episodes of HBO’s “True Blood” won’t begin to air until June 13, but you can quench your thirst for supernatural sleaze with the show’s first minisode, featuring vampire sheriff Eric Northman (Alexander Skarsgard) and his sexy sidekick Pam (Kristin Bauer) auditioning human dancers for their Fangtasia nightclub.

Enjoy: