Comparing Halloween haunts to Rob Zombie’s Great American Nightmare is like comparing apples to apples with razor blades. Zombie’s inaugural haunt and concert event is more of a Lollapalooza type deal with less hippies and more hellbillies. Held at the Fairplex in Pomona every Thursday-Sunday now until Nov. 2, the event is a great Halloween destination for friends to hang out, drink, and groove.

Every night features genre-specific musical acts (metal, alternative rock, electronic dance, Latin, etc), freak shows, and an outdoor movie theater showing classic fright flicks. The night my wife, Mrs. Muertos, and I attended (Oct. 19) featured performances on stage by punk rock heroes The Vandals, TSOL, and the Dickies.

Though it’d been awhile since the little lady and I had pogoed and moshed the night away, we were there for the haunt; to experience the “bonechilling” mazes inspired by three of Zombie’s films: The Lords of Salem Total Blackout, The Haunted World Of El Superbeasto, and Haunt of a 1,000 Corpses.

First up was The Lords of Salem Blackout, where thick black hoods were thrown over our heads before we were sent off to navigate a narrow and winding maze. Along the way the floor shifted beneath our feet and light shocks of electricity buzzed our hands as we felt our way through the darkness (apologies to guards we may have groped).

It’s was a disturbing experience, one that made us anxious to see where the trail would end and what horrors we’d face once the hoods came off. When that moment arrived, we found ourselves at… the next maze. That was it for the first. It was over. Now, I get it. It’s called LoS Blackout. But, it feels like a cheat, especially considering the film’s warped and inspired imagery. Chalk it up to missed opportunity.

The Haunted World of El Superbeasto is 3D, fluorescent painted fun. It’s the raunchier of the three mazes, but not as sleazy as the animated feature it’s based on. Except for the vaginal entrance, which one must push through pink, squishy walls (genius!), the majority of obscenities are spray painted on the walls. There are a couple of dildo-wielding Superbeastos, but not nearly enough bra-busting Suzi-X’s.

Haunt of a 1,000 Corpses rounds out the mazes with a display of hillbilly horror and animatronic beasts. Captain Spaulding marked our foreheads with a sign to let his minions know we were lambs to the slaughter. Poked and pushed through the maze by insult-hurling inbreds and necrophiliacs, we witnessed a variety of backwoods terror, including a Charlie Manson-like family murder and a violent suicide.

Rob Zombie’s Great American Nightmare is on its last severed leg (it ends Nov. 2). While not as shocking as hyped, it is a fun way to spend Halloween. To purchase tickets and for complete event details, visit www.greatamericannightmare.com.