Angelina Jolie Gravitates to Alfonso Cuaron’s ‘Gravity’ (Or Not)


Acclaimed director Alfonso Cuaron has tapped Oscar-winning actress Angelina Jolie to headline his new sci-fi thriller Gravity. Written by Cuaron and his son Jonas, the film follows a failed space expedition’s sole survivor (Jolie) as she attempts to head back home to her daughter on Earth.

While additional details about the film are being kept under wraps, it has been reported that Jolie will most likely be the only actor seen on screen and could possibly be playing the daughter role as well (Jolie as an identical mother/daughter team? Wow. I hope they can’t hear me masturbate in space).

Jolie reportedly backed out of Univeral Pictures Wanted 2 to work with Cuaron. The 48-year-old Mexican director impressive creds include Children of Men, Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban, and Y Tu Mama Tambien.

Warner Bros. will handle distribution for the film. David Heyman (Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows) and Legendary Pictures are producing.

UPDATE: Everything you read apparently is bullshit. Jolie’s reps are saying that the actress has passed on Gravity. I know, you feel angry for having taken the time to read this. I too am disappointed having wasted five minutes to write it. I could have jerked off in that time … twice.

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