Easter weekend is upon us and that means big brunches, lunches, and dinners with the family … unless, of course, you’re an unloved heathen destined to burn in a lake of fire. With these wonderful meals, however, comes weight gain. But, don’t worry. You can shed those extra pounds by utilizing your gaming console.
It’s been medically proven that playing highly involved action games like Dead Space, Medal of Honor, and any racing game will cause your body to flex its muscles, most notably the sphincter. This will keep your ass tone.
Just take a look at this demonstration:
Watching this demonstration over and over again can also help build up your right bicep. So, eat up and enjoy the weekend.
By Eddie Muertos on April 3rd, 2010 at 3:36 am
Category: Trailers /
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Warner Bros. has released the first official trailer for director Vincenzo Natali’s (Cube) long-delayed sci-fi morality tale Splice, starring Adrien Brody (Predators) and Sarah Polley (Dawn of the Dead) as ethically-compromised geneticists who successfully splice human and animal DNA to create a hybrid female named Dren.
Take a look:
I don’t know a lot about science, but I think things would have gone better for everyone in this movie if Brody and Polley’s characters had simply followed the John Hughes formula of Barbie doll + game of Life + bra on head = Kelly LeBrock. Just saying.
Splice arrives in theaters on June 4. To see images and read an interview with director Vincenzo Natali, click here.
“Gossip Girl” Jessica Szohr is starring as a bikini-clad coed in director Alexandre Aja’s upcoming Piranha 3-D remake. The 25-year-old actress also works a sexy two-piece in the new “Rock Your Shine” marketing campaign for Ocean Pacific.
Personally, I was never a fan of OP. I am, however, down with O.P.P. Yeah, you know me.
These are shots of Bradley Cooper and Abbie Cornish in New York filming scenes that involve lots of running for director Neil Burger’s upcoming thriller Limitless.
Based on the book by Alan Glynn, Limitless is the story of a struggling copy-writer (Cooper) who finds financial success after stealing an experimental pharmaceutical drug called MDT-48 that makes people smarter, but slows down their perception of time.
Cornish plays Cooper’s wife in the film. Robert De Niro costars as the heavy out to get Cooper’s character. Check out this gallery:
IFC Films has unleashed the first official trailer for its controversial mad-doctor film The Human Centipede: First Sequence, available OnDemand on April 28 and in limited theatrical release beginning April 30.
Directed by Dutch filmmaker Tom Six, Centipede stars newbie actresses Ashlynn Yennie and Ashley C. Williams as American tourists abducted by an evil German scientist hell-bent on creating a human centipede by sewing people together mouth-to-anus.
The film costars Akihiro Kitamura, Dieter Laser, and Andreas Leupold and has already won awards on the film festival circuit, including Best Picture at the 2009 Scream Fest LA Film Festival and Best Horror Film at the 2009 Fantastic Fest. Six is currently working on a sequel, which will feature a 15 person human centipede.
Says star Ashlynn Yennie:
It was a little uncomfortable. …I think the most uncomfortable part was being down on all fours with your mouth … your jaw hurts mostly, because your mouth was open on a bit. But it wasn’t that bad, I’ll be honest. It wasn’t that bad to be on all fours.
Normally when we told people they were going to sew people together they thought it was going to be shoulder to shoulder, but we’re like “No … ass-to-mouth … it’s great.”
To see an interview and scene with Yennie click here.
Katie Cassidy, daughter to ’70s teen idol David Cassidy, stars in Platinum Dunes upcoming remake of the Wes Craven classic A Nightmare on Elm Street. The 23-year-old hottie takes on the role of Tina (now named Kris) played by Amanda Wyss (The Graves) in the original.
I was just a little tween Muertos when I saw Elm Street in ’84 and Tina’s death scene played a number on my fragile young mind, frightening me with its intensity—yet giving me wood at the sight of Tina’s panties while she was thrown from wall-to-wall. It remains one of my favorite moments in horror.
Cassidy’s previous horror creds include the lead in Dimension Films’ 2006 Black Christmas remake, Screen Gems’ When a Stranger Calls remake, The Lost, and, most recently, the television serials “Supernatural” and “Harper’s island.”
A Nightmare on Elm Street 2010 is directed by Samuel Bayer and costars Rooney Mara as Nancy Thompson, Twilight’s Kellen Lutz, and Jackie Earle Haley as child molester/killer Freddy Krueger. The film arrives in theaters on April 30.
And, don’t forget to check out what original Elm Street director Wes Craven is up to these days: My Soul to Take and Scream 4.
OK, so it’s April Fool’s Day. If you’ve been surfing the web, you’ve probably been mislead and pranked while searching out juicy Hollywood gossip and interracial gang-bang scenes. But, relax, you’re at Clatto now. Here, we laugh at other people’s misfortunes.
It is in that spirit that I am posting the following two videos. You may have seen them before, but they are classic examples of fucked up pranks.
The first made its way around the net back around Christmas time and shows you why so many black people grow up to be so damn angry.
Check it out:
This next vid is especially brutal because we all know how bad it sucks to be poor (see clip above lol). Take a look at some asshats as they trick their buddy into thinking he won the lottery:
Ashley Jones plays waitress/shape-shifter Daphne Landry on HBO’s hit vampire series “True Blood.” But, the 33-year-old actress almost missed out on the career-making part due to an inexplicable fear of nudity. Fortunately, the need for rent money helped her get over those pesky self-respect issues.
She tells FHM U.K.:
When we got down to the final auditions I thought I wouldn’t get the part as the other two girls I was up against said they were okay with the nudity and I wasn’t comfortable in getting everything out.
But luckily they went with me, it just meant that I had sign off on the nakedness. I was fine with being shot from the back and showing a bit of butt, but I got to see each shot and could veto anything I didn’t like.
Way to flip-flop there, Ashley! But, hey, whatever gets you to drop trou is a good thing.
Jones can be seen in the May issue of FHM U.K. magazine.
The internet was aflutter this week with news that Megan Fox was to step into Angelina Jolie’s shorts to play video-game-heroine-turned-action-movie-bad-ass Lara Croft. Unfortunately for all our cocks, Fox has reportedly turned down the part (rumors say she’s tired of ongoing comparisons to Jolie).
But, don’t despair! A new hope has arrived!
Tabloid sensation and “Hills” star Heidi Montag has announced her interest in playing a bustier and blonder version of Lara Croft.
She tweets:
I want to be blonde Tomb Raider, I’m better with guns then both Angelina and Megan Fox put together!
By guns, I’m guessing she is referring to her new triple-D’s. Sadly, I doubt producers will hang a potentially lucrative franchise on Montag’s nips. But, that’s OK. I’m just hoping she manages to get her 3-D boobs vs. shark screenplay made.
‘True Blood” star Anna Paquin alludes to having carpet-munched at some point in her life during a PSA for Cyndi Lauper’s Give a Damn project, an online campaign designed to remind us to stop beating up gay people.
Paquin says in the spot:
I’m bisexual and I give a damn because one hate crime is committed approximately every hour of every day in this country.
The announcement comes as a surprise being that Paquin is engaged to “True Blood” costar and love-interest Stephen Moyer.
Understandably, the Oscar-winner’s declaration has eclipsed the PSA’s anti-discrimination message in favor of speculation over whose muff Paquin has dived into (The Give a Damn website has been down due to overwhelming interest).
The campaign also features some of Hollywood’s more obvious and less attractive turd-stealers and clam-smackers, including Elton John, Clay Aiken, Cynthia Nixon, Whoopi Goldberg, and Wanda Sykes.
