If you’ve ever had to take a shit in a public restroom, you’ve probably worried about a roach crawling up your asshole and/or contracting AIDs from the toilet seat.
Well, now, Spanish filmmaker Daniel Barosa gives us something new to worry about in his latest short La Rubia Del Bano (The Bathroom Blonde).
Hmm. All-in-all, that blonde chick is pretty hot … for me to poop on!
On Wednesday, April 28, make sure to drop by ABC’s “Happy Town” to visit with sexy stars Lauren German (Hostel 2, Texas Chainsaw Massacre) and Amy Acker (Cabin in the Woods, “Angel”).
Set in the small town of Haplin, Minnesota, “Happy Town” revolves around a murder—the first in five years—thought to be committed by a mysterious entity known as “The Magic Man.”
The official synopsis reads:
Haplin, Minnesota, “Happy Town,” has enjoyed an uneasy peace for five years, but all that is about to change. Still haunted by a number of unsolved kidnappings, the small town now faces a dark new crime that brings all its unresolved fears to the surface. Has the elusive “Magic Man” – who many believe is responsible for the bizarre abductions — returned to claim another victim? As Haplin’s mysteries are revealed, many of its prominent citizens’ motives come under scrutiny as their own secrets and personalities are peeled back one layer at a time.
German plays candle shop owner Henley Boone, a new resident to the mysterious town of Haplin who may know some secrets about the townsfolk thanks to stories told to her by her recently deceased mother.
Acker’s role is that of Rachel Conroy, wife to Deputy Sheriff Tommy Conroy. As her husband investigates the murder, Rachel finds herself inexplicably drawn to the case and the community’s feared suspect “The Magic Man.”
Eager to see German and Acker in action? You can catch the series premiere now by visiting http://abc.go.com/watch/happy-town/gate and entering the password “happytown6.”
Lionsgate has released a confirmed cast list for Saw 7. Joining series regulars Costas Mandylor (Det. Hoffman), Betsy Russell (Jill Tuck), and the great Tobin Bell (John Kramer/Jigsaw), are genre babe Gina Holden (Alien Vs. Predator, Final Destination 3) and original Saw star Cary Elwes.
Elwes will reprise his role as Dr. Lawrence Gordon, the oncologist who sawed off his own foot during one of Jigsaw’s most elaborate games in part one of horror’s most successful franchise to date.
Holden, best known for her work on the TV shows “Harper’s Island” and “Flash Gordon,” will play a woman named Joyce. No word yet on what her role in Jigsaw’s scheme will be.
Also joining the cast are Sean Patrick Flanery (Mongolian Death Worm), Chad Donella (Final Destination) Laurence Anthony, Dean Armstrong, and Naomi Sniekus.
Saw 7 is directed by Kevin Greutert (Saw 6) and was shot in authentic 3-D. It arrives in theaters on Oct. 22.
The film’s official synopsis reads:
This October, one of the biggest, most successful horror franchises in movie history arrives in theaters in vivid, chilling 3-D with the release of Lionsgate’s SAW VII 3-D.
As a deadly battle rages over Jigsaw’s brutal legacy, a group of Jigsaw survivors gathers to seek the support of self-help guru and fellow survivor Bobby Dagen, a man whose own dark secrets unleash a new wave of terror…
The first theatrical feature to be shot exclusively on the cutting-edge SI-3D digital camera system, SAW VII 3-D brings the horrifying games of Jigsaw to life like never before. The film stars Tobin Bell, Cary Elwes, Costas Mandylor, Betsy Russell and Sean Patrick Flannery. SAW VII is directed by Kevin Greutert, produced by Oren Koules, Mark Burg and Gregg Hoffman. SAW VII 3D is a Lionsgate Release. Twisted Pictures Presents a Burg/Koules/Hoffman Production.
Saw 6 was the best entry in the series since Saw 3. I’m thrilled to see Greutert back at the helm despite his ugly falling out with Lionsgate (read about it here).
Marvel Studios held a press junket in Los Angeles yesterday to promote the upcoming release of director Jon Favreau’s Iron Man 2. The film’s all-star cast was on hand to suck each other’s dicks and pretend to like those in the media.
Not surprisingly, actress Gwyneth Paltrow sucked her own dick while discussing her role in the film as supporting character Pepper Potts. She also downplayed the star-power of Scarlett Johansson’s boobs.
She said:
It’s not only a film for fifteen year old boys. It’s a film that can relate to a lot of people on a lot of levels and a lot of my girlfriends like it because of the romance.
Scarlett in the trailer, it’s appealing, like, ‘Who is she?’ It doesn’t look gratuitous. It looks like there are interesting women in the movie and certainly from the first one, too, my character is quick and she’s articulate and I think that makes it so that when you take your kid, if you’re a mom, it’s really fun for you to watch as well.
So it’s nice to see women who are aspirational, smart and sexy all at the same time.
Hmm. Iron Man is one of those rare superhero movies that is well written and not entirely cheesy, but no one is dropping coin to see if Tony Stark will kiss Pepper Potts. And, casting Johansson is always wonderfully gratuitous.
Iron Man 2 hits theaters on May 7.
A 2006 promo-trailer for antichrist superstar Marilyn Manson’s long-abandoned project Phantasmagoria:The Visions of Lewis Carroll was posted yesterday on MarilynManson.net. The clip has never been seen before.
The film, inspired by “Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland” author Lewis Carroll, features Manson’s cock-accessories Evan Rachel Wood and Dita Von Teese, the latter of which turns in a nude performance.
From Manson’s site:
Originally conceived in 2004 with pre-production throughout 2005 via The Wild Bunch (UK) and with an initial budget of $5-7 million, ‘Phantasmagoria’ was due to begin filming in 2006. Lily Cole, inspiration of Tim Burton’s recent ‘Alice in Wonderland’, was originally cast as Manson’s Alice for ‘Phantasmagoria’.
This teaser also features real-life twin sisters engaging in questionable acts and burlesque superstar Dita Von Teese in artistic full-nude. The figure in the medical mask is artist Gottfried Helnwein, and the bird-face masked character and white-gloved Lewis Carroll impresario [are both] Marilyn Manson.
No official word yet on whether Manson plans to give Phantasmagoria:The Visions of Lewis Carroll another go. I certainly hope so.
Sweet dreams are made of this.
Of all the recent Alice in Wonderland re-imaginings, this one seems most interesting—even more so than the porn adaptation starring Sasha Grey. And, I swear on your children’s lives, I’m not just saying that because the clip showed some labia.
The new trailer for Summit Entertainment’s The Twilight Saga: Eclipse premiered today on the Oprah Winfrey show and is now being viewed online by millions of self-cutting tweens.
The clip sets up the rise of a malicious vampire army and dives deeper into Bella Swan’s love triangle with vampire Edward Cullen and teen wolf Jacob (writing that sentence just made my balls roll out the room).
Question: Why do the werewolves look so ridiculously huge? They’re the size of rhinos!
Eclipse is directed by David Slade and arrives in theaters on June 30.
To see photos of stars Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart sucking face, click here.
Ridley Scott once said he would never shoot a sequel. Fortunately for fans of the renowned director’s 1979 sci-fi classic Alien, he never said a thing about prequels.
Scott, fresh off his Robin Hood reboot, assured MTV that the Alien prequel he is directing for Twentieth Century Fox is a go, noting that he has a story and lead character set in place.
He says:
We know what the story is. We’re now actually trying to improve the three acts and make the characters better, build it up to something [we can shoot]. It’s a work in progress, but we’re actually making the film. There’s no question about it, we’re going to make the film.
It’s set in 2085, about 30 years before Sigourney [Weaver’s character Ellen Ripley]. It’s fundamentally about going out to find out ‘Who the hell was that Space Jockey? The guy who was sitting in the chair in the alien vehicle — there was a giant fellow sitting in a seat on what looked to be either a piece of technology or an astronomer’s chair and our man [Tom Skerritt as Captain Dallas] climbs up and says “There’s been an explosion in his chest from the inside out — what was that?” I’m basically explaining who that Space Jockey — we call him the Space Jockey — I’m explaining who the space jockeys were.
The main character [in the prequel] will be a woman, yeah. We’re thinking it could go down that route, yeah.
Perhaps, most exciting is Scott’s plans to collaborate with original Alien creature designer H.R. Giger on creating new creatures.
Yeah, he’s [Giger] still around. Once I get more serious and get going, and the big wheels start turning, we’ll certainly talk. And maybe we’ll come up with something completely different. The alien in a sense, as a shape, is worn out.
According to Scott, the Alien prequel will most likely be out in 2011 or 2012.
Director Breck Eisner will most likely follow up his remake of George Romero’s The Crazies with another, namely New Line’s long-delayed Escape from New York. Negotiations are currently underway.
Originally written and directed by horror icon John Carpenter, Eisner and screenwriter Allan Loeb’s take on New York will still find former soldier-turned-criminal Snake Plissken rescuing a government official from the outskirts of Manhattan, which has been turned into a large privately-run penal colony. The film will also add a Plissken origin story to the mix.
New Line acquired the rights to Escape from New York in 2007 and had cast actor Gerard Butler as Snake. Butler is no longer attached to star.
Carpenter’s 1982 sci-fi classic The Thing is also getting the remake treatment from Universal Pictures.
Vancouver-based Twisted Twins Productions have released a new trailer for their quirky thrill-kill comedy Dead Hooker in a Trunk. Written and directed by studio heads Jen and Sylvia Soska, the film follows four friends on a ridiculously complicated quest to dispose of the body of the dead prostitute they find in their car.
The official synopsis reads:
Set in beautiful Vancouver, four friends head out on an everyday errand and end up in a fight for their lives when they discover the body of a dead hooker left in their trunk. Led by a sexy, impulsive Badass; her distant Geek twin sister; their Bible-thumping, Jesus-loving Goody Two-Shoes friend; and a chaotic, rock star Junkie pal, the group has to put aside their differences to dispose of the body before they’re next.
Thrown into their own personal purgatory, they face off against persistent police, a sleazy motel manager, chainsaw-wielding triads, and a brutal serial killer. All the while they are followed by a mysterious Cowboy Pimp who wants to claim the corpse for his own. Will they uncover the truth behind the body and be able to stand up to their demons?
Buckle up, and get ready for the ride of your life filled with gunfights, extreme violence, blood, guts, gore, and goats.
Like the Avellan sisters, Jen and Sylvia Soska are actual twins. How that fact makes this flick better I don’t know, yet it does.
They used to be triplets.
No word yet on when or if this film will hit theaters.
Serial killers, though frightening by nature, are notorious slackers. Sure, their body counts can reach double digits, but that usually takes years. Why? Because, as any legendary FBI profiler John Douglas will tell you, serial killers have cooling periods.
But, imagine if there was an unusually ambitious killer who wasn’t satisfied committing three-to-four murders a year; a killer who wanted more than just a handful of thumbs and nipples as trophies. Now, that would be truly scary.
Well, director Darren Lynn Bousman is tackling that premise in his new slasher Ninety. Written by Scott Milam (Mother’s Day), Ninety follows a serial killer determined to slaughter 90 people in 90 minutes.
Explains Bousman:
It’s psychotic and it’s crazy. I wanted to do a movie that’s fun. 11-11-11 and Mother’s Day are not fun movies. Ninety is fun. It’s 90 kills in 90 minutes. Done. Sold. Buy my ticket. We’re talking unique kills, too; it’s not like I just put ninety people in a room and dropped a bomb.
When you’re going to kill ninety people in a movie, after a while it could become monotonous. You’ll feel like, “Okay, I’ve seen this. I’m done.” To combat that, we’re going out of our way to make our killer cool and badass, like Mickey and Mallory were in NBK.
You’ll see the movie and just want to be the killer. Obviously we don’t want anyone to ever emulate being a killer as obviously that’s wrong, but we made sure our guy is just very likable. There’s two times that you’ll even want to high-five him.
Bausman creds include the end-of-days frightener 11-11-11, the eagerly anticipated, but still-delayed Rebecca De Mornay vehicle Mother’s Day, the organ-harvesting cult classic Repo! The Genetic Opera and, of course, Saw 2,3,and 4.